But he’s so dang funny!  Where else are you going to find a guy who tricks his ex-girlfriend into teaching a trained parrot derogatory phrases about himself, then uses said parrot to prank call the police so he can sneak into the station and take needed supplies?

Rufus’ objective in Deponia is to find a way off the titular planet, which is essentially a gigantic junkyard.  He wants to escape his proletarian lifestyle by going to Elysium, the bourgeois neighbouring planet, so that people will finally recognize him for the wonderful gift to humanity he is.  To this end, he is constantly designing new contraptions to assist himself.  A scenario at the start of the game seamlessly blends the story with the point-and-click gameplay, with the player collecting tools to build a pulley system that will latch onto a passing ship and carry him aboard.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Deponia - Review

One of the strongest points is the story.  The game picks up shortly after the events of KH2 and Re:Coded, with our heroes attempting the Mark of Mastery exam, which, if they succeed, will make them true Keyblade Masters.  To pass, they must each travel to seven worlds and save the Square and Disney characters therein from the darkness of new enemies called Dream Eaters.  Simple enough, right?  This review is spoiler-free, but suffice it to say that things get a heckuvalot more complicated by the end.  Unresolved plot points from each previous game are referenced frequently, and the final world throws a veritable nerdgasm of plot twists and exposition your way.  The ending is a clear setup for Kingdom Hearts 3, but a lot of loose ends still get wrapped up and it’s nice to know just how the plots from the previous five games will be working together to finish things up.  Be warned, though: this game is full to the brim with KH jargon.  You unlock periodic summaries of previous games as you play, but if you don’t know what a Nobody is, the difference between a Keyblade and a X-blade (also pronounced ‘key’), or who gave their heart to whom, then you’re going to be completely lost here.  Newcomers should play some of the other games first, particularly the first two numbered entries and Birth By Sleep.

You don’t need to have played anything, though, to appreciate the action-packed fighting system.  At the most basic level, Kingdom Hearts 3D uses the series’ trademark real-time Action-RPG combat system, so you’ll be spending a lot of time bashing bad guys with your Keyblade using the A button, and using magic and other flashy commands with X.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance - Review

It’s a question that haunts young Geron throughout The Dark Eye: Chains of Satinav.  Thirteen years ago, an evil Seer prophesied that Geron would bring about the end of the world.  He was promptly burned at the stake.  After that, the only thing worrying the Kingdom of Andergast was its ongoing war against its neighbor, Nostria.  The game begins innocently enough, when Geron, being a bird-catcher and having won an audience with the king in a contest, is instructed by the king to clear some ravens out of his guest bedroom so that a visit with a Nostrian monarch can run smoothly.

However, it soon becomes clear that these ravens are not what they appear, with their mere presence enough to make a man go mad.  They soon infect the land by the thousands and, convinced the Seer has returned, Geron’s teacher, Gwinnling, sends him to fetch a fairy from the forest who is the key to undoing the curse.  When he returns with the fairy, Nuri, however, she is greeted less than openly.  See, Gwinnling neglected to tell Geron that the way she could halt the curse is by… well, not being alive anymore.  Being a young man of honor, Geron won’t stand for this.  He rescues Nuri from an angry mob and sets out to find the Fairy Scholar, the only one who may know enough about magic to break the curse without murder.

And so the real adventure begins.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - The Dark Eye: Chains of Satinav - Review

This issue is made worse by the fact that, when you start out, you only have one car unlocked.  You have to earn the others by winning races, time trials, or the Elimination mode where the driver in last place is destroyed every ten seconds.  It wouldn’t be such a big problem, except for the fact that the car you get at the beginning can’t take corners to save its life.  It's annoying trying to win a race with something that has the turn radius of a one-legged horse; a problem which could have been alleviated if more than one car was available at the start.

Even in multiplayer, you can only use the cars you’ve unlocked in the single-player modes, meaning you’ll be stuck using the same car if you fire up split-screen when you first turn the game on.  There is no online play.  While there are laughs to be had by speeding around and crashing into your friends, the halved or quartered screen exacerbates the camera problems by letting you see even less of the track.

The single player mode does little to make up for the failings of the multiplayer.  You’ve got what looks like a large variety of content.  However, the challenges constantly repeat, with little variation.  You just won a race at the Kingdom of Bahrain?  Good.  Now do the same thing backwards.  It’s tedious, yet necessary if you want to unlock all the vehicles.

On the bright side, the presentation is pretty.  The cars are cartoony and toy-like, evoking a sense of childlike joy at bashing them together.  The level variety is diverse, ranging from speedways to deserts to tropical paradises, and you feel a sense of intense speed as you fire up your Nitro.  The music is energetic and suits the fast-paced nature of the races.  The biggest achievement here, though, is that there is almost no such thing as a loading time.  Press one button after finishing part of a circuit, and the next level will be loaded instantly.

So, like that plain ol’ ham sandwich, Bang Bang Racing sates the appetite but doesn’t really please the palette.  The core gameplay is fine, but it could have used a little something extra, and it’s more of a holdover until you can find something more satisfying.

This review is based on a digital copy of Bang Bang Racing for XBLA provided by the publishers.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Bang Bang Racing (XBLA) - Review

Dwarves begin the game in a new starting area — the wasteland in which their stone bodies were found.  For our demo, we ran around the area casting spells and bashing ‘filthy cave rats’ and ‘blind abyss spiders,’ and of course nabbing loot.  There was also a new low-level instance that we didn’t get to see, which will be mandatory when playing as a dwarf and will show how their story connects to the Runes of Magic world at large.

Some of the most important additions to the game are the two new classes available exclusively to dwarves.  First, the Champion class wields a gigantic axe or hammer and has the ability to transform into a Rune Robot.  A trailer shows him fighting a tiger that is twice his size, and yet he easily fends it off with some mighty swipes and devastating dark magic.  Transforming into the giant, crystalline Rune Robot pretty much seals its fate.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Burning Through Runes of Magic Chapter V: Fires of Shadowforge - Preview

Three basic mechanics are at play in Sport’s Connection’s baseball game: pitching, batting, and fielding.  The player controlling pitching and fielding uses the GamePad, while the batter uses the familiar method of swinging around the Wii Remote.  As pitcher, you’ve got a first-person view on the touchscreen, and you aim and arc the shot by drawing a line on the touchscreen.  Be careful to end it inside an onscreen box, or it’ll be a ‘ball’ for the other team.

As mentioned, the batting controls are similar to those in Wii Sports, but they’re more refined here due to the MotionPlus controls.  I felt my actions were much better represented here, and any strikes or fouls were completely due to my own inaccuracy.  In this situation, you can bet that hitting a home run felt pretty damn sweet.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Playing Catch with Sports Connection - Preview

Now, where do we go next? Declare the idea a success and move on to an original project? Hah, no. This is Activision we’re talking about — it’s sequel time, and it probably will be for the next five years, too. Luckily, from what I played at their E3 booth, Skylanders Giants is still shaping up to be a quality way to spend some time with your kids.

Having made such a large time and cash investment in the original, the first question that will be on a lot of minds is if the two games will be cross-compatible. To a degree, yes. The new Giant toys will not be usable in the first Skylanders. However, all characters released for last year’s game are compatible with this year’s edition, and all of their hard-earned levels and stats will be well intact. The level cap has been raised from 10 to 15, so even if you maxed anyone out in the first game, that character will have plenty to do here.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Skylanders Giants: Playing with Portals - Preview

It all starts with our main character, Geron.  Thirteen years ago, before being burned at the stake, a seer prophesied that the lad would bring about the end of the world.  Now the seer has seemingly returned to fulfill his promise, and the birds of the Kingdom of Andergast has become violent and started attacking everyone they see.  Now Geron must go on a quest to change his fate.

The first thing that struck me upon seeing the game in action is its striking graphic-novel art style.  For a sprite-based game, the animation is exquisite, and it certainly looks like a comic book come to life.  As Mr. Schweer loaded up a section of the first chapter, the vibrant Autumn marketplace scene was spellbinding.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - The Dark Eye: Chains of Satinav is... Well, Dark - Preview

At its core, the game does what it says on the box, putting you in the shoes (or, in some cases, snappy neckties) of a character from the Mario universe for another round of tennis.  However, the big hook this time around is the ability to play as your Mii, which is certainly the route I went with for most of my playtime.  I’ve got to say, the game gets points for being the first Mii game I’ve seen that actually lets you move them around manually, so kudos for that.

As far as the actual tennis matches go, it’s an entertaining formula that mixes the traditional sport with the strategy of a game of rock-paper-scissors.  You’ve got different buttons (physical or virtual) for different kinds of swings, and you’ll want to try to stay a step ahead of your opponent by serving and returning in an unpredictable manner.  Holding the button slightly longer charges your swing at the risk of potentially letting the ball bounce past you.  The additional strategy comes into play with the small, colored circles that occasionally appear on your side of the court.  If you hit the ball from inside the circle with the swing that corresponds to that color, you’ll execute a move that is very difficult to retaliate against.  When you’re on the receiving end of one of these Chance Shots, you’ll have to return the ball with the opposite shot type from the one your opponent used, or you will be momentarily made dizzy and left open for another assault.  There is a definite learning curve, as it takes a while to learn which colors correspond to which shot type, but it does make for some intense, fast-paced matches.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Mario Tennis Open - Review

Now this is a real man’s game.

And why is that?  This game gives us men the control we so desperately crave.  Two beautiful women dared me to command their every action and rate their ‘performance’.  Without further ado, we put on some music and got busy.  As with previous Just Dance titles, players holding Wii Remotes must follow the dance moves shown onscreen in order to get the highest score possible.  This time, though, control was in my hand.  With a Wii U GamePad in my hand and Moves Like Jagger blaring, I got to work giving my orders.  Every few seconds, four dance moves would appear on the touchscreen, and I’d have to pick one for my puppets to perform.  Watching them try to keep up and outdo one another for the sake of my pleasure was great for my ego.  Once in a while, the game asked me choose who had been doing the best until then, and gave that dancer bonus points.  Sorry, ‘Happy’, you may have been perky, but ‘Jazzy’ never once said ‘I am not doing that move!’

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Boost Your Ego with Just Dance 4 - Preview

The asymmetrical multiplayer game is a new take on capture-the-flag.  The map I played on seemed to be an abandoned parking lot.  One player, using a Wii U Pro controller or Wii Remote, plays a standard first-person shooter on the TV.  Their goal is to take flags scattered at various points throughout the map by standing close to them for a period of time.  The problem?  The other player, on the GamePad tablet, is playing RTS-style, sending zombies to both kill him and take flags of their own.  This player, who is supposedly a sadistic game master, has an overhead view and can spawn one of the four zombie types anywhere that is outside of the survivor’s line of sight. 

The basic zombie pretty much just stands around until the survivor runs near him, but groups of them can quickly overwhelm your opponent, who dies in one hit unless he has a hypodermic needle with which to jab in the neck.  Other units include a tank-style one that chases the survivor and can take a lot of punishment, and a speedy guy that is good for surprise attacks and is difficult to avoid, among others.  To keep the game from getting unbalanced, only ten zombies can be in the game at once, and stronger ones take more from your stash of resources to summon.

On the survivor’s side, there’s a standard toolset.  The weapons on offer were a pistol, a shotgun, and a crossbow, and a weak shove attack could be used to push encroachers back.  You can also pick up a turret and place it at a strategic location.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Don't Get Bitten in Zombi U's Multiplayer Mode - Preview

I was lucky enough to get some private eyes-on time with the game, courtesy of Daedalic Communication Head Hauke Schweer.  It was apparent from the outset that realism isn’t a huge priority here.  The game began underground in a dark cavern, where a gangly midget told Rufus it was time for the tutorial.  To this, the character mused, “Wasn’t the game supposed to have started already?”  Despite the little guy’s protestations, Mr. Schweer skipped the tutorial in the interests of time, choosing the ‘I don’t need no stinking tutorials’ option.

As mentioned, the plot of the game revolves around Rufus trying to leave Deponia, and the gameplay centers around enacting his constantly-failing plans to that end.  When the real game started, Rufus was in his extremely messy home, which he until recently shared with his ex-girlfriend, Goal.  The first order of business was to find some supplies—a toothbrush, four socks, some provisions, and a bolt cutter.  Rufus wasn’t quite sure why he put ‘bolt cutter’ on the list, but what the heck, right?

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Go To Space Heaven With Deponia - Preview

Three game modes were on offer, which naturally meant that I played three game modes.  The first, Ranger Battle, let me select a ranger and go to town on a bunch of Moogers.  Swiping horizontally or vertically with my right hand swung his huge sword, while I could theoretically punch with the left.  ‘Theoretically,’ because I could not successfully perform this action even once, and it was the same deal with kicking.  Luckily, the sword was more than enough to get through everything.  Awkwardly, movement is accomplished by attacking — performing an attack makes you walk toward the nearest enemy.  This made it difficult when trying to attack the one behind it that was gearing up to strike.  Eventually, I got to a boss that required a fair bit of strategy and dexterity to beat.  In a manner reminiscent of Punch-Out, I had to lean left or right, jump, or duck in order to avoid swings of his tail before I was allowed to hit him with a combo.  To finish him off, I had to hold my arms in a certain position to perform a special attack, but it took at least five minutes to do this properly; the rep even admitted that I was doing it right and the Kinect simply was not reading it how it should have.  The second gametype played similarly to that fight, but put me, first-person, in the cockpit of the MegaZord.

The third gametype was a little different — Ranger Training.  Ever wanted to play Simon Says with the Power Rangers?  Well, first off, go see a therapist.  Second, meh.  At the beginning, one ranger performed an action (like a punch with the right fist) which I had to then copy.  Each successive step increased the number of moves I had to do without messing up.  Does Kinect really need another game where you simply follow the movements of an onscreen character?

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - It's Morphing Time With Power Rangers Samurai Kinect - Preview

As far as features go, the game uses the Wii U GamePad to help you get fit in new ways.  The first of the two minigames I got to try out had me standing on the Balance Board while holding the GamePad like a tray in front of me.  Food was placed on the tray in-game (visible on the touchscreen), and I was tasked with physically running around a restaurant full of Miis to serve.  Tilting the pad turned my character, but it also tilted the tray, forcing a delicate (and literal) balancing act between keeping the food steady and avoiding obstacles while arriving at my destination in a timely manner.  It was difficult, but unfortunately this was due to the fact that turning your character and tilting the tray are accomplished the same way.  I have never seen a real-life waiter who tilted his tray to the right when he had to turn in that direction, and this caused me to drop more orders than I care to admit.  For my performance, I received one star out of five.  “Well,” the rep said, “it’s a good thing you’re a writer and not a waiter.”

Thanks, nonspecific Nintendo booth babe.  I needed that.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Serve Virtual Cupcakes in Wii Fit U - Preview

I tried three of the several available activities in the game, each requiring different actions in order to be successful.  The first two centred around Quidditch, the franchise’s iconic broomstick-flying sport.  In one, I played as Harry, who plays the Seeker on his team and whose sole role is to catch the flying snitch and end the game.  Gameplay-wise, this translated to an on-rails game where Harry chased it automatically.  All I had to do was lean in different directions to move Harry, which allowed me to keep him on the speed-boosting golden path the Snitch left in its wake.  Once I caught up to it, the view shifted to first-person, and I had to move Harry’s hand so that it covered the Snitch for several seconds, thus winning the game.  According to the rep I had the fastest time of the day, but the real satisfying part was being able to physically punch rival Seeker Draco Malfoy in the face when he got too close.

Next, I played as the Keeper, which is basically Quidditch’s equivalent of a goalie.  This simple game had me contorting my body to swat away Quaffles tossed by the other team.  The first round was relatively simple, mostly sending only one of them at me at a time.  As the game progressed, I’d sometimes have to hold my left foot to the side while reaching up with my right hand in order to block a couple at once.  Matters were complicated further when they started sending Bludgers my way, which I had to avoid or I would take damage.  Still, the game never really approached ‘challenging,’ as I only got hit two or three times and didn’t let a single Quaffle get by me.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Harry Potter For Kinect Casts a Spell on Me - Preview

What’s one thing we haven’t seen in the last eight years?  A new Pikmin.

A new entry in Nintendo’s quirky real-time strategy series was mentioned a few E3s ago by Nintendo’s  esteemed general manager of software development, Shigeru Miyamoto, though only when he was put under duress.  This past Tuesday, a considerably less-stressed Miyamoto-san walked on-stage at the Nokia Theatre for Nintendo’s yearly press conference, whimsically carting about ‘real’ versions of the diminuitive little flowery critters, and gleefully announced Pikmin 3 as a launch window title for the Wii U.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Pikmin 3: Proof That HD And Colour Can Co-exist? - Preview

The demo began in a nondescript hallway similar to many from the original game.  Controls felt instantly familiar thanks to the similarities between Wii U button placement and those of the 360 and PS3, so there was little learning curve.  What has changed here is that you no longer have to pause the game to access inventory, upgrade gadgets, or check the map.  A few simple taps of the touch-screen let you equip an item, buy a new move, or get your bearings without necessitating a pause in the game.  In a neat little touch, Batman starts fiddling with the batcomputer on his arm when you do this, furthering the illusion that you are the Dark Knight.

Moving through a door and running into some enemies, the basic combat remains unchanged.  Apparently my skill with the game was obvious, as the rep guiding me through the demo reacted with a ‘Well, you’ve obviously played this before!’  So you shouldn’t have any problem handling Batman in a fight if you’ve already played Arkham City.  That’s not to say there aren’t new elements to deal with, though, as dishing out enough pain lets you put Batman in BAT Mode, which briefly makes enemies glow bright orange and makes you twice as strong.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Batman on Wii U: Nintendo has finally entered B.A.T. mode - Preview

For those who don’t know, DmC: Devil May Cry is a reboot of the popular demon-slaying beat-em-up franchise.  In this world, the demons control the world’s finances, the police, and pretty much everything else.  Luckily, Dante is back, and he’s ready to kill.  In our behind-closed-doors demo, we were shown a mid-game level called The Devil’s Dalliance.  It took place in a nightclub owned by a delightful woman named Lilith.  A gruff guard outside told Dante he was not on the guest list.  At this, Dante uppercut him in the face, knocking him out, then caught the clipboard and pen, wrote ‘F**k you,’ on it, and said, “I am now.”

You know, no big deal.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - E3 2012: DmC Catches Our EyE - Preview

Flo Rida and a bunch of sexy babes danced to what gamrReview contributor Alex St-Amour correctly dubbed “generic inoffensive rap.”  This new entry in the series will be launching this October for Xbox 360, PS3, Wii, and Wii U, with the latter receiving undisclosed exclusive content.

Boobs.  Your character begins Far Cry 3 by groping them.  The jungle island setting is back, but show host Aisha Tyler warned us that Far Cry 3 is “…no day at the beach.”  Once finished getting his virtual hard-on, your character turns and gives a motivational speech to the rest of the tribe, who… apparently just like to watch.  Evidently, your character used to be a tortured victim of a man named Vos, and has now broken free and rallied the local natives against him.

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Ubisoft Press Conference Wrap-Up - Article

This is an excerpt from the full story which was originally featured on gamrReview, read the full version here - Spirit Camera: The Cursed Memoir - Review